What's Up?
3/31/08 Spring has sprung. Open Mic indeed…
I went with Paula to Portland last night since she had a five hour photography seminar and I decided to go to a Sunday open mic night in south Portland. I found a few on the internet that afternoon and one looked like a fun time, a possible audition for a future gig, and to road test a couple of new solo mandolin tunes I'd been working on. The place had a great website, a current music calender and pics of a nice stage and ambience in a nice cool little neighborhood. I dropped off Paula at the convention center and was all excited as I drove south through the rain and sleet only to find the place gutted, boarded up, and out of business. Being ever so organized, I took out my trusty little list of three other Portland Sunday open mics and found one about 5 miles north down by the waterfront. This time I called ahead and sure enough, sign-up's at 7:30. When I got there I couldn't believe my eyes. You might be safer walking through the Mission district with a case of Jack Daniels and a Rolex watch at midnight than to even stop at a traffic light in this neighborhood! If you went to that open mic, your car probably wouldn't be there when you came out. So off I sped to the next one on the list. I'd already been to the bookstores downtown in case you are thinking "why doesn't he do something else?" The next and last sunday night open mic location was in a posh neighborhood on the lower east side sandwiched between a J.Jill's Boutique and a Starbucks. After parking my extention ladder laden pickup truck amidst the Jaguars, BMWs, and Escalades, I then proceded down the daphodile lined walkway past the waterfall fountain to the Monteclair Cafe and Wine Bar. How refreshing. I opened the door and stepped inside and was buoyantly greeted by the open mic host in the foreground of a towering stack of amplifiers engulfing a shirtless lanky twenty-something young man with a ring in his nose and black fingernail polish attempting to tune a Walmart copy of a Gibson Les Paul electric guitar. The host of this evenings soon to be memorable event looked down in astonishment at my mandolin case and asked if I remembered to bring a pick-up for "that ukelele' in order to participate in tonight's jam. "Dooood!!!." Needless to say I drove back to the parking lot of the convention center and spent the next three hours in the passenger seat of my pickup truck writing a new tune on my mandolin entitled, "Don't Forget To Call Ahead."
Oh, and I'll be in Phoenix, AZ in early May for two dates...one private and one public. See "schedule" for more info. Later on...
Winter '07
More than three years have passed since our good friend Ethan Rutkoff hopped out of his Volvo in my driveway and said; "Man, you need to update your website," I think I said procrastination has given way to necessity. Lately, we've had to update everything including Chiquita the dog who is now pushing fifteen and still going strong thanks to a prescribed regimen of steroids. I've never seen a dog chase a baseball with such enthusiasm.
If this is your first time visiting my website then welcome. If not, then you know the drill. Check back every five years and see if there's something different. Although maybe I'll become a blogger and add something daily. But don't count on it. Some newcomers to the sight will notice the John Edwards '08 banner at the bottom of the first page. "Oh ma God, he's one of those tree hugging, Bush kicking democrats." What were you expecting here, a link to Anne Coulter's website? Chimpeach!!!
Well, we moved a year or so ago. After 15 years of waiting for it to rain we figured that the Northwest would be a pleasant option. There's no waiting here. I'll take it. They have art here. We like expansive so hence, we packed up in September '06 and barreled north. Since then I wrote some new material with a new recording in mind, became co-founder of The No Fault Liability String Band, sold two guitars, bought another guitar, opened up a new window cleaning business, made two trips back to AZ to work, and started teaching mandolin and guitar. Paula had a grand opening at her photography studio, was handed thirty days notice three days later, and then found a better studio anyway with a lease. I guess Gwen O' Connell of O'Connell properties here in Eugene needed a bigger office, and just in time for the holidaze much to the chagrin of the hastily displaced tennants. If you saw her, you'd see why. That's not very nice, huh? You know, me weighing in (what pun?) with such observation and all...oh, never the mind...on to other things...
We got a real Christmas tree this year, $8. The stand was $20 after we found a store that still had them in stock. Fancy too. It has these little plastic quick release clips that break when you put the tree in the stand. Everything breaks nowadays. The government gives tax incentives to corporations to move overseas and make shit that breaks. Then after our jobs are gone they want us to take out healthcare savings accounts. Okay, A.D.D, I know.
I especially like parts that come so tightly sealed in plastic that you have to break the part just to get it open. You need an axe, ya know? If I could keep the cats out of the Christmas tree for just a bit, it might remain upright. Now don't get me wrong, I like the holidays. Have you seen the hammer? How about the tape? It was just here a minute ago. What do you mean we don't have enough lights? What do you mean the dog got the eggnog out of the fridge and drank it. Hmmm. Must be the steroids. If I hear "Jingle Bell Rock" one more time...Where's that hammer!? I mean really...
I'm a child of the sixties. Every year my dad would take us down to pick out a tree then we'd bring it home and he'd take it out in the backyard and spray flock all over it so it would look like someone watered it and rolled it in laundry detergent. It didn't snow where I grew up. Then we'd put it up and get out (trumpets please) THE COLOR WHEEL. Remember the sound? "Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh" it would go and slowly change colors. One year the neighbors got an aluminum tree that revolved in the window across the street. It also made that Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh sound. Unfortunately the cat tried to climb it and was electricuted in the window for all to see. They were out of town when it happened and we had to look at it for a week. Ahhh, such are the sights and sounds of the season, a big piece of charred, mangled metal spinning around with a big clump of charcoal and fur in the middle of it. High tech for those days.
This year we've taken a hard look at the shove it down your throat consumerism that seems to start earlier every year and started buying gifts from local artists and crafts people who need your support much more than Mall Wort does. So please, buy local when you can. Eat local when you can. And take some food to your local foodbank so less fortunate folks can eat too. Okay that's it for now. Wear your seatbelts and have a great season. Check back soon.
STEVE GOODBAR'S TOO LATE TO BE WORLD FAMOUS TUNA SALAD
Okay, so maybe tuna's not your boat. Or maybe you have a boat and there's no tuna in it. In that case you'll have to row to the market. Take the nearest flooded street but call first and make sure they are still there. While you're there don't forget the rest of the ingredients. Me and Matt used to fish the Russian River in Northern California endlessly for tuna and never did catch one. Or anything else for that matter. We even lost the truck. What do you expect for two guys who think there might be a tuna in the Russian?
First and foremost, if you can get even close to fresh tuna by all means get it. Here in the Great Northwest we have easy access but a good can of albacore tuna will work fine for those of you who find the fresh tuna that arrives in Nebraska a month after it was caught off the coast of Siberia, appalling. No wonder so many people aren't tuna connoisseurs. There are some cans out there that ain't half bad. Just remember you get what you pay for. The following will serve two of the crew so adjust accordingly and don't forget to improvise.
- One 6 oz. can of Albacore tuna well drained
- Three heaping tablespoons of mayonnaise
- Two green onions with chives finely chopped
- One stalk of celery split and chopped
- One clove of garlic chopped
- Five unsalted almonds chopped
- 1/4 tblspn lemon juice
- One tblspn dill pickle relish
- 1/4 tspn horseradish
- 1/4 tblspn ground turmeric
- One dash of lemon pepper
Mix tuna in bowl with ingredients and add the mayonnaise last. Mix thoroughly. Place in fridge overnight, take hostages, and serve on really good nine-grain bread. Ya Mon!
